Sunday, January 6, 2008

Excerpts from my third book Close Your Eyes and Dream With Me


SITTING ON THE STAIRWAY TO SALVATION


One day walking on my way to work
I seen this woman sitting on some church stairs,
her palms tightly pressed together looking up
towards the heavens, moving her lips lightning quick, saying her prayers.
She never believed in God, but she found herself sitting on his stairs.
Started to believe in a higher power
after figuring out that no one down here cares.
I was about fifty feet away, but I was well aware of all that made
her hair gray, I felt her deepest darkest fears.
From where I was standing I heard her sighing, she started crying,
shedding troublesome tears all over those holy stairs.

She was heavily breathing
and wanted with all of her heart
to begin believing.
She was sitting on the stairway to salvation
praying to possess a stress free soul
that wouldn’t give into this earth’s temptation.

Sitting on the stairs shaking, hoping to awaken
from the deep dark dream that couldn’t seem more real.
A lost soul looking to take control of her meaningless life,
I thought to myself and said, that’s the exact same way I feel.
I could see the pain on her face and imagined how her insides looked,
mumbling a prayer to once and for all heal,
she was running out of time
and was searching desperately for the holy grail.
A journey to the afterlife is a long, we wish for someone to watch
over us when it is time to set sail.

I thought about what life does to people,
I pray not to grow up and be in the same position,
how horrible it would be to live through every day of your life
and feel like there is always something missing.
I’m sure she has sat on the stairway to salvation before
and got up quickly after realizing God didn’t even have time to listen.
She had on dirty clothes that could never be cleansed, I wonder
If this woman ever had a chance to glisten?
She sat on the stairway to salvation like all of us will at some point,
trying to find a reason to continue existing.


She was heavily breathing
and wanted with all of her heart
to begin believing.
She was sitting on the stairway to salvation
praying to possess a stress free soul
that wouldn’t give into this earth’s temptation.


Whether or not our purpose ever rises to the surface,
or maybe it will stay buried underneath all of our desire?
Trying to please everyone of our bodily needs won’t bring us up
towards the clouds, but down towards the fire.
I am an angel waiting in the wings here on earth wondering
if I’m holy enough for God to hire,
my spirit is turning sour
and is ready to expire.
I found myself sitting next to this woman on the stairway to heaven
as we both hoped to sit somewhere higher.






CLOSE YOUR EYES AND DREAM WITH ME


Close your eyes and dream with me
and imagine everything you ever wanted to be,
after long enough of mentally viewing your deepest desires,
you will live inside the fantasy you used to just see.

Close your eyes and dream with me
and imagine peace in your heart and peace in your mind,
suffering is a stage we must all experience,
it will not last forever throughout time.

Close your eyes and dream with me
and imagine holding everything out of your grasps,
you outsmarted your enemies and now you rule the world
and there’s no reason why your reign can’t forever last.

Close your eyes and dream with me
and let’s block out everything that distracts us,
sin makes us feel better immediately,
that’s the reason it attracts us.

Close your eyes and dream with me
and imagine changing all that is wrong,
dream about building a peaceful place
where us outcasts finally feel like we belong.

Close your eyes and dream with me
and imagine all the problems, poverty and pain disappearing,
dream about living inside a world
where everyone’s characters were created for caring.

Close your eyes and dream with me
and imagine loving everything you once hated,
fulfilling your ultimate destiny,
the reason why you were created.

Close your eyes and dream with me
go ahead and shut them tight,
and continue to dream that everyone will one view the world
and see the same beautiful sight.





I’M IN LOVE WITH A PROSTITUTE NAMED PATRICIA


I fell in love with Patricia
long before she started selling
her body for money.
She’s still my girl
even though other men call her honey.

Patricia knew I loved her deeply,
she also knew her profession was slowly killing me.
Employed with a career that slowly destroys,
she was not a bad person,
only a person with limited possibilities.
When she was only 12
her father introduced her to oral sex,
a true tale
with a moral everyone might not get.

Patricia’s mom passed away when she was 13,
that was her best friend.
It signified the beginning of the end as
she became pregnant at 14,
had her baby at 15,
spent 9 months as an expectant mother
and 9 months as a dope fiend.

Needle fed heroine
into her daughter’s blood stream.
The baby didn’t want to get high
but when you’re an embryo
no one can hear you scream.
A mother and an addict
who will never kick her habit,
it’s the only way
she knows how to cope with dilemmas.
I can still picture it now,
a cigarette in her hand
while her body experienced tremors.
I remember being at the house
washing the floor and doing the dishes,
hoping that I could rejuvenate her mind
to once again experience wishes.

I could not provide comfort
for 24 hours a day,
she needed to make her pay
and being a prostitute was the only way.
I wish
I was the only man in her life
who got to hug and kiss her.
She might be a prostitute named Patricia
but on my night stand I’ll always have her picture
and tell her every night how much I miss her.







I SWEAR TO GOD


God what the fuck!!!
Can’t you hear anything I say?

I have been asking for fucking help for years,
if you don’t answer me soon,
today is the last day I fucking pray!

Yeah, fuck that!
Pretty soon
I’m going to stop believing this religion bullshit,
I’m starting to think it has no meaning.

Fuck my values!
Fuck my ethics!
I try to live righteously,
but all anyone wants to do is fight,
I live a good life, but no one respects it.

I mean what the fuck’s the point,
there might not even be any heavenly kingdom?
It might be all mother fucking lies!
I’ll never be able to hear angels singing!

If this fucking life is all there is,
I’m going to be so fucking pissed!
So much shit I fucking missed!
So many girls I could have kissed!

Crazy sex, drugs, stealing, killing,
living a life all out wild,
I didn’t do any of it
because I believed that I was God’s child!
God, I’m in fucking denial!

I’m sick and don’t know if I’ll get well,
if there is a God,
sometimes it’s so hard to fucking tell!
I swear to fucking God
if you can hear me
send me straight to fucking hell!

I swear to fucking God
I did all I could for every person
but my situation would always worsen,
that’s why God, that I’m fucking cursing!

I’m down here
drowning in your fucking rain,
that’s why I am pointing my
fucking finger towards you with blame!

I swear to fucking God
I see demons while I’m dreaming,
no God, no angels, no saints.
Look at the life captured inside my books,
the picture that someone like me paints.

I swear to fucking God
you better show me a sign
that I’m not losing
my mother fucking mind.

I’m calling you out God,
Mr. Mother fucking divine.
Mr. I eat the bread that is your body
and drink your blood you say is wine.

Show yourself to me God!
Don’t you think it’s about fucking time?
You’re hiding up in the clouds
while we’re down here dying!
Those punk mother fucker prophets from the bible,
Moses, John, Matthew, Paul,
they were all fucking lying!

That’s fucking right God,
I’m questioning your power,
your courage, your entire fucking existence!
I swear to God that if you showed yourself,
I would stop writing this in an instance.

I was fucking taught
to believe in you at an early age
and now I’m asking you to believe in me!
Stop avoiding and eluding me,
stop fucking deceiving me!
Show yourself God,
it’s time for you to guide us with your grace.
Show yourself God,
it’s time for you to show your mother fucking face!!!!





A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG GIRL

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl dreams to be dead?
A lifeless body drained of pain,
the only image that plays in her head.

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl contemplates prostitution?
Not because of pleasure, but because she is broke
and this is the only job that is somewhat of a solution.

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl with piles of potential is a drug addict?
Her friends tell her that she can sell drugs for them, but she
just gets high off her own supply and will never be able to kick her habit.

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl has a beautiful young girl of her own?
She hires dealers and addicts to watch her child when she’s not home,
it’s either that or have her daughter be all alone.

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl has no one to help her, only to hurt her?
She has people running to her with their problems,
but when she is in her time of need everyone seems to desert her.

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl cries for help and no one responds?
There are thousands of these beautiful young girls
and not one of them feels like they belong.

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl can barely even breathe?
Told me she has hurt so much
that she no longer knows how it feels to grieve.

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl gets sexually abused by her dad?
He calls her names like slut, loser, tramp, bitch.
Is she supposed to go out into the world and not feel sad?

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl can’t even afford any groceries?
What’s wrong with this world?
I know this is not how it is supposed to be.

What’s wrong with this world
when a beautiful young girl can’t see because she has tears in her eyes?
No 1 cares about this beautiful young girl while she is alive
and no 1 will care about this beautiful young girl when she dies.






A FINAL KISS GOODBYE


This kiss is blown

to everyone who ever loved and admired me
and it’s blown to those who were never too fond.
It’s for those who didn’t fall in love with my fame and fortune,
this kiss is placed on the face of those who loved me all along.
This kiss is for the 1 woman who was meant to hold my hand
and walk with me on my wedding day down the aisle.
This kiss is placed on the face
of the only girl in the whole world who could make me smile.
This kiss is blown to those who looked out for my best interests,
it’s for those who never took advantage of me, so the number is few.
As you read this, it could be very likely,
that this final kiss goodbye was meant, just for you.

This kiss is blown

to everyone who believed and trusted in me
with all their heart.
This kiss is placed on the face of those who knew
the light inside of me would shine in the deepest of dark.
This kiss is blown to all those who never met me
and it’s for all those who knew me extremely well.
This kiss is placed on the face of everyone
who was aware I lived each day halfway between heaven and hell.
This kiss is blown to the world, my time on earth is coming to an end.
When I leave, you might miss me, but try not to cry,
blown from my loving lifeless lips,
I send to you

a final kiss goodbye.







A TALE OF 2 CITIES, 2005


In 1 city houses are surrounded
by white picket fences
with flowers growing freely on their lawn,
illustrate a picture of a perfect community
and this city would be drawn.
Freshly painted houses never chip,
nothing in this community could be tainted.
Doors stay unlocked
without bars on the windows,
if you get chilly all you do is turn up the heat
every time the cold wind blows.
People go to work everyday
accomplishing their goals,
they go home and eat delicious dinners
and always have extra butter
to spread on their rolls.
In 1 city people are selfish
and only watch out for their own backs,
but today they’re going to take a trip
and see how people
live on the other side of the tracks.

Houses are falling apart,
people’s sidewalks and lawns
are filled with litter.
Look around someone’s house in this city
and it won’t be too long
before you spot a tiny little critter.
Paint has been peeling
off houses for years,
drenched by acid rain
from troublesome tears.
People peek out of their blinds
to catch a glimpse of the sun,
parents don’t let their children go out after dark
because every kid on these streets
either has a knife or a gun.
People stay in bed
because their desire is dead,
they only get up and go to work
to make sure that their family is fed.
People get jealous
and crimes are committed,
the hearts that beat in this community are filled with hate
and it will never change unless
their spirits are lifted.
People from this city
have a harder time trying to make it because
the world believes
anything that grows here could not be gifted.

This is a tale of 2 cities
which takes place in the year 2005.
In 1 city people leave their house and live,
in the other city people leave their house
and hope to survive.






A DAMSEL IN DISTRESS NAMED DANIELLE


Danielle’s summer
was hot as hell,
had a summer reading list,
but she wasn’t too concerned
about trying to read and trying to spell.
Only 15, but had seen
that wearing tight tops
attracted the most handsome looking,
sexy, spectacular, sculpted jocks.
Her sultry style got her a date
with the schools biggest stud,
he arrived at her parents’ house looking spiffy,
he brought flowers and even
greeted her mom with a hug.
Sometimes the sweetest looking face
covers up a soul that is bitter,
pulled into an empty parking lot,
he didn’t waste any time trying to flirt,
he just lifted up her skirt and did her.

At school her story
was being discussed by groups of girls near lockers,
everyone was shocked Danielle
and this model of a looking man hooked up,
it was one of the semester’s biggest shockers.
The gorgeous guy walked down the hallway confidently
with an extra small tight white tee-shirt
and a pair of Dockers.
Overnight, Danielle went from a nobody
to becoming a goddess at her school,
no one wanted to take her to a dance
or give her a glance, nothing but a feminine fool.
Now, she makes penis’ pulsate inside of boys pants,
they stare at and drool.
Danielle’s confidence grew
and there was not a thing anyone could do,
she started sleeping around
and became the high school whore,
her dreams were coming true…
Always in detention,
a great ways to get a boy’s attention,
she was the girl everyone knew.

Danielle was a good student, but once she
started stripping and skipping, down dropped
her draws and her grades.
Started coming to class thinking she was a star
rocking beautiful braids and dark shades
and every speckle of glitter on her body
stood for all the people who she laid.
On the outside Danielle couldn’t be more happy,
on the inside, she couldn’t be more afraid.
Went to the clinic and got tested for AIDS,
tested positive,
astonished and amazed.
Contracted HIV and
Danielle isn’t sure if she will make it to age 23,
everything she wanted ruined her
and now Danielle dreams
of everything she used to be.

It wasn’t too long ago
Danielle was a good girl,
now she carries around her filth
and everywhere she goes
she also carries around her guilt.
Every little skimpy outfit she owned
she threw out and said, good riddance,
she cries when she sees the same boys and knows
they will only touch her
if they are wearing mittens.
Danielle is just one of many girls
that tries to be with the in crowd,
all those girls who walk in Danielle’s high heel shoes,
just be real, I hope you are hearing
Danielle’s story clearly and loud.
If Danielle’s life could help change another
she would be proud.

Danielle is a damsel in distress,
I don’t have to ramble any longer,
you know Danielle’s life is a mess.
She awaits her sentence of death
and leaves her house everyday
wearing a long black dress.

GOD BLESS......

2 comments:

sandra lixxy said...


My Name is Elizbeth Lawson from united states ...HIV has been ongoing in my family for long..I lost both parents to HIV and it is so much pain has not been able to get over. As we all know medically, there is no solution or cure for HIV and the cost for Medication is very expensive. Someone introduced me to a man (Native Medical Practitioner). I showed the man all my Tests and Results and I told him have already diagnosed with HIV and have spent thousands of dollars on medication. I said I will like to try him cause someone introduced me to him. He asked me sorts of questions and I answered him correctly. To cut the story short, He prepared some herbal medicine for me and he thought me how am going to use them all. At first I was skeptical but I just gave it a try. I was on his Medication for 3 days and I used herbal medicine according to his prescription. That he will finish the rest himself. And I called him 3 days after, I arrived and I told him what is the next thing he said, he has been expecting my call. He told me to visit my doctor for another test. Honestly speaking, i never believe all he was saying until after the test when my doctor mention the statement that am, HIV negative and the doctor started asking me how do I do it....Am telling this story in case anyone may need this man’s help. He is the Great prophet ekpen here is via email address atitispellcaster@gmail.com Thanks Regard....(((( or call him on +2348110651073. )))


sandra lixxy said...


My Name is Elizbeth Lawson from united states ...HIV has been ongoing in my family for long..I lost both parents to HIV and it is so much pain has not been able to get over. As we all know medically, there is no solution or cure for HIV and the cost for Medication is very expensive. Someone introduced me to a man (Native Medical Practitioner). I showed the man all my Tests and Results and I told him have already diagnosed with HIV and have spent thousands of dollars on medication. I said I will like to try him cause someone introduced me to him. He asked me sorts of questions and I answered him correctly. To cut the story short, He prepared some herbal medicine for me and he thought me how am going to use them all. At first I was skeptical but I just gave it a try. I was on his Medication for 3 days and I used herbal medicine according to his prescription. That he will finish the rest himself. And I called him 3 days after, I arrived and I told him what is the next thing he said, he has been expecting my call. He told me to visit my doctor for another test. Honestly speaking, i never believe all he was saying until after the test when my doctor mention the statement that am, HIV negative and the doctor started asking me how do I do it....Am telling this story in case anyone may need this man’s help. He is the Great prophet ekpen here is via email address atitispellcaster@gmail.com Thanks Regard....(((( or call him on +2348110651073. )))


 
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