Sunday, January 6, 2008

Excerpts from my second book A Thought and A Tear for Every Day of the Year


SOUND OF THE PLAYGROUND


Swinging stickball bats and basketballs dribbling,
kids with chalk on the ground scribbling while birds are singing,
kids hanging around diddling.

A slap shot, a football being caught,
today no 1 has fought.
When you’re young, the playground is the spot.

Kick balls whipped,
chips eaten, sodas sipped,
sneakers scrape the ground from a hop scotch skip.

Kids running around playing tag,
kids glow as they boast and brag,
snacks someone brings back from the store in a plastic bag.

Wheels on bikes spinning,
excitement, a new day at the playground is just beginning,
kids wanting a chance at winning, begging to play just 1 more inning.

Kids running through sprinklers, clothes soaking wet,
at the playground no one is ever upset,
kids getting tired sitting back and watching the sun set.

Frisbees flying,
a kid who has to go home begins crying,
who ever said, heaven is a playground, sure wasn’t lying.







SELF PORTRAIT


I attempt to draw a portrait of myself without paint or a brush,
I have no skill with some tools, but I am gifted when I grasp a pen full of ink.
I make sure to capture every detail, I try not to rush,
a poem, more effective than a painting, imagine how I look, see how I think.
I sketch, then color, line by line,
leaving behind the shadowy figure which lives inside my mind.

The unfamiliar face covering my insane ideas,
the lookout that houses my telescopes like eyes.
My lips, my goatee, my nose and my satellite antenna ears,
my dangerous image covering up my heavenly disguise.
A voice the world has not yet heard,
forced to write down everything that occurred.

Working my way down this figure, we come across a treasure buried in my chest
which contains jewels worth more than anything that could ever be purchased.
It is the instrument that beat on me to be the best,
its historic fights with the sorrow underneath my skin has suddenly surfaced.
The epic battle of good verses evil, sin verses saint,
and Lucifer against the Lord, on the ceiling of my belly sketched with paint.

Then there is my back, which carries the world and all its weight.
Sometimes it hunches me over and it appears I might fall.
I will not tip over and crumble, I will keep walking until I am able to stand up straight.
I choose to carry my grief, without it I wouldn’t have anything to hold on to at all.
Speaking of holding, I have to mention my hands
which molded life from meaningless strands.







KELLY’S KID


If Kelly’s kid was created by 2 people
who hated their lives and abused their minds,
what will become of Kelly’s little girl as she grows up
and does not know other ways to deal with tough times?
I don’t blame the young man
and I don’t blame the young lady,
it’s not their fault
because they were also created crazy.
I don’t know if there will come a time
when this wickedness will wither,
maybe it will be after a boy realizes he becomes a man
when he opens up his mind and closes his zipper.
Just because you see a pretty girl
does not mean you have to kiss her,
how can you say you love her
if you are not sure you would even miss her?
You don’t impress anyone, these days
it’s much easier to open up the door underneath their drawers,
as easy as it would be to go out every night
and break existing laws.
It doesn’t matter if the laws are right, or
if the laws are wrong,
a father who creates a child and abandons it, teaches his child
they live inside a world where they will never belong.
Try to imagine growing in life
and feeling like a mistake,
blowing out candles on birthdays,
but were never meant to have cakes.

The courts have decided that on weekends
she can visit her daddy, to talk and maybe even have a meal,
no one loves him enough to pay his bail, they stare at each other eating
through the mirror separating them in the county jail.
Her father has been in and out of prison
for as long as she has known,
so many men have come in and out of Kelly’s house,
Kelly’s kid had a hard time remembering which one was her own.
She grew up in a hotel for the hopeless,
every guy in town tried to make that their residence.
Kelly’s kid goes to school but her mind stays at home,
trying to figure out life, she could care less about learning past presidents.

A little food for thought
if you believe knowledge produces power,
when Kelly’s food stamps expire, 1 less lesson
and 1 less meal for her daughter’s mind and mouth to devour.

I have been in Kelly’s house, I know Kelly’s kid
and I am not lying,
I know the moment Kelly reads this
she will immediately start crying.
I’m sorry,
if I didn’t tell,
the world would never come together and start trying
to find a way to keep Kelly’s kid from dying.
We all have our own problems, but we can’t ignore reality.
I guess they’re right when they say, the truth hurts,
almost as much as the pain virgins feel all over the world
when they are too quick to lift up their skirts.
I told you before not to don’t listen when we say we love you
because at a young age there is only 1 reason why a boy flirts.
The can of worms we call the world, I broke
open the cover and removed the lid,
a baby conceived corrupted
before it gets a chance to crawl out of the crib.
Another child is born and
another father has ran and hid.
There are thousands of children all over the universe
that live in the same type of home as Kelly’s kid,
until we fix the problem they will all continue to pay the price
for things they never did.





DISCIPLINE AND WISDOM


The search for infinite wisdom,
to achieve great knowledge
all you have to do is open your ears and listen.

What makes a person smart
has nothing to do with how much you know,
over time the way to achieve wisdom
has become a lost art.

Discipline
is the key that opens doors,
food,
objects we consume,
if the diet we digest daily
doesn’t go down smooth, it can bring us to our doom.

It’s better to have an empty stomach
than to have a stomach that is always full,
years of sitting down at the table
and being been fed bull.

When your stomach is empty
you search for more,
when your stomach is full
you lie down and snore.

If you’re always satisfied
you’ll never know what it’s like to starve,
just like a person who has never been deeply hurt
will never know how it feels to be scarred.

Don’t let your stomach and your head get too fat,
be weary of what you eat.
Believing you always deserve something
so you are quick to serve yourself a treat.
Don’t eat too much that is sweet
and watch as your mindset carries over to everyday life,
watching closely where you place your feet.

Foods high in saturated fat clog arteries
and clutter veins with grease,
your stomach and your mind
will never be at peace.

This applies to everything in life
as circumstances get more complex,
pleasure and satisfaction
yes, I’m talking about sex.
From the top to the bottom,
going down and staying above,
being with too many people over a period of time
makes you forget how to use your heart, you forget how to love.

Now you are gaining experience
and superior knowledge,
how to act as a person
is a class they do not teach in college.
The real education
on how to control virtue and vice.
Discipline
has brought you
wisdom,
bringing you
perfect vision.
Take care of yourself
and gain compassion for other people’s hearts,
they can claim to know it all,
but in my book,
this is what I call being smart.






RHYME AND REASON

Republicans look out for the wealthy, Democrats look out for the poor.
Couldn’t we have a party that looked out for every human
so we wouldn’t have to suffer anymore?

The government hides secrets at Area 51,
don’t we have the right to know what exists in space
and hides beyond the sun?

The President declares war and formulates a draft.
Thousands of people die and nothing changes,
add up casualties, subtract blood, times it by tears, do the math.

Every weekend, get drunk and high.
Wake up and contemplate suicide
because you realize the world won’t be effected if you live or die.

I look at Mount Rushmore and want to blow it to pieces.
I’m going to write a paper about the founding fathers, title it
“The Great Seal” and use the term conspiracy for my thesis.

God bless America, what about God bless the world?
God bless every American little boy
and God bless every Iranian and Iraqi little girl.

Get to work on time every day and see how it pays of.
Work at a company your entire life, a year before you retire
you lose everything and get laid off.

As long as money is more powerful than knowledge, criminals will remain at large.
The idea of a man being successful because of his earnings
is society’s ultimate mirage.

Kill a madman and create a madder man who will follow.
Save the day,
but make it worse for the children of tomorrow.

My words are filled with facts until the day I leave, man.
In a world full of crime and treason
my head is filled with rhyme and reason.





A LETTER ADDRESSED TO THE DEAD SENT FROM THE LIVING


This letter is sent to spirits
as I search for wisdom
that exists beyond,
this life is not worth living
I need to know what’s next
so I can stay strong and continue on.
I need to know if I will be able to see light
long after my eyes are closed,
I need to know if the soul is the real life
and if the body is just a disguise
that is cleverly covered and clothed.
Will I be able to see my loved ones again
that I miss so much,
will they appear the same and will
I still be able to hear their voice
and feel their loving touch?

Tell me which religion is the most righteous,
which religion explains it all
and which religion is most divine?
If I believe in the wrong things
will it hurt my chances
of lasting throughout time?
Could you tell me what God looks like?
Is he black, brown or white?
What does he want from me?
I need to know if it has been Satan
or an unsettled spirit that follows
and continues to haunt me.
Tell me about hell and tell me about heaven,
let me know where I will spend the rest of my days.
Explain the secrets of the universe
like how the sky turns from blue to gray
and who controls the sun and its rays?
Help me to better comprehend space,
it appears to last forever, but does it end?
I’m also interested to know if the wound created by war
between the West and East will be able to mend?
I hope you are not angry with my questions
and I apologize if in any way you have been offended.
I’ll be looking forward to a response
once I send it.

Just 1 more question,
where exactly is your address?
Should I make it out to the dead,
or should I make it out to death?
I’ll make sure to leave my location
where you can send your reply.
If you don’t have enough time
to answer all of my questions,
just answer the question,
what happens when you die?







I KNEW THIS GIRL FROM DOWNTOWN WHO LIKED TO GET AROUND


I met her in the subway.

It was late at night
as she stepped onto the train
looking for a fight.
Empty, except for a few scattered souls.
She calmed down and asked me for a light.

I told her I was sorry
and that I didn’t smoke
as I pulled out the insides of my pockets
to show how badly broke.

I could tell she had been drinking
even though I was sitting
on the opposite side of the train.
Her eyes and mouth
were moving at the speed of light,
but I could tell there was a standstill
inside her brain.

She got up out of her seat
and began to dance around for kicks,
she stood in front of the window
and started to shake her hips,
she grabbed her purse
and put Maybelline on her lashes
and Revlon on her lips.

She finished making herself up,
spun around and stared at me.
Her face, like a book colored by a 3-year-old
who couldn’t stay inside the lines.
Strutted her stuff as she sat down next to me,
whispering in my ear,
asking how she looked about100 times.

She removed her jacket
that looked like
a combination of a cape
and a curtain.
Placing her hand on my knee,
I knew for certain
this female was well trained
at the art of flirting.

Attracted to her figure,
but turned off by the way she was acting,
hadn’t fallen, but with every action
you could see her concrete skin cracking.

I was focused on shorts
that barely covered her butt,
she wasn’t wearing a bra,
only a tight white tank top t-shirt, halfway cut.
Her left nipple served as the period
to the word on her shirt, slut.

Asked me to come home with her
and mentioned how she liked rough sex.
Battling my emotions,
I declined as I didn’t want to take advantage of this girl
with a great body and a clouded mind.

She stepped off the train
and gave me the finger
as the door slammed tight.
I got home, laid in my bed
and turned off the light.

What a night…







NATURE’S MESSAGE


Nature has a story to tell,
listen to the message being told.
The land we live on is neither heaven nor hell,
secret scripts are not always written in bold.
Whispers in the wind, pay attention,
people have many things to say, most of which is bad news.
Nature tells of truth ordinary humans forget to mention,
we search for answers and walk over clues.
Tears fall from the sky, making the ground wet,
the sun’s smile appears to dry the rain,
a drop falls from our eyes when we are upset,
a loved 1 comforts to minimize the pain.
Listen to leaves on a windy day, they beg for your appreciation,
they are cheering, giving you a standing ovation.





HEADING OUT OF CONTROL


Kerri lives on the street
behind me. She’s 12 years old with a figure
that’s pretty plump and kinda chunky,
she stands at about 4’3,
so she’s pretty short and kinda stumpy.

Not quite a teenager,
but she is already participating in activities
meant for adults,
thinking sexy,
acting sexy,
looking sexy,
makes sex the eventual result.

Puberty hasn’t taken over her body
yet she has the ability
to make every 15-year-old boy’s heart melt.
Her parents showed little affection at home,
Kerri only experienced love
when she was being felt.

I call her an entrepreneur
because she stated her own business.
The name of her company, How to Unbuckle a Boy’s Belt.
Right off the bat business was booming,
word hit the street
and Kerri experienced great success.
Called the head doctor
because she was too young
to engage in anything, but oral sex.
Profits and penises were rising by the minute.
Cash was the preferred payment,
her customers were too young
for credit cards and checks.

Down the street from her house
was an abandoned garage
where she conducted her covert operation,
it’s the spot where young kids
from all over the neighborhood
would give in to pleasurable temptation.
It looked like a ride at a Disney World vacation,
with kids standing in line anxiously waiting.
At the end of the night Kerri was soaking wet
from sperm and perspiration.

Kerri is heading out of control
before she blew out a cake
with 16 candles,
becoming a pro, taking two customers at a time.
holding on for dear life to hard handles.
A dirty business
that will go down as 1 of the all-time top scandals.








A FOOTPRINT LEFT IN THE SNOW


It’s winter now and the world is frozen.
Icicles remind me of cold tears that can’t fall to the ground.
Peers who had their fate chosen, the gates to heaven quickly closing,
the echo of fallen friends makes a stirring sound.
Shovel out sorrow and make a path for joy,
things come into focus as we grow older,
back to innocence as a little girl or a little boy,
my heart grows colder.
Rushing out the door, headed on my way,
equipped with all my belongings, I don’t know how long I’ll be,
no one wants to listen, I have nothing left to say,
traveling through a blizzard, I can barely see.
A footprint left in the snow,
follow its path, it will show you where to go.





THE SMARTEST MAN I NEVER MET


The man snuck into a library
where he secretly lived there for months.
I was given orders by my boss
to clean out his room,
I did, but my curiosity
also made me rummage
through his backpack.
It seemed as though every possession
the man owned was in this bag,
little trinkets which told stories
about his past.

It turned this homeless man
was a chemical biologist
who spoke 5 languages
and was outstanding at math.
He was a college graduate who attended
Harvard and M.I.T.
I began to wonder how an educated man
could end up living up in a10-foot-wide closet?

I guess intelligence does not help
when it come to controlling emotions
as I continued to search through his bag.
I found health magazines,
I also found a few Playboys and a bottle of lotion,
along with a large poster
of a beautiful beach showing the sun
reflecting off the ocean.

His green jacket hung over the chair,
it smelled terrible like a mixture
of urine, sperm, crumbs and grease,
stains on his jacket covered stains on his soul,
I wondered about long nights
and if there was any peace?

When I found his empty wallet
it had a single picture of a house
where he probably used to reside,
it was damp as if it never dried
from times he looked at it and cried.

I wish I could have talked to him
to find what made him so upset,
my hello and goodbye
to the smartest man I never met.

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