Draft of, Placement of Truth, from a future project tentatively titled, “Dampness”

Placement of Truth by Jasen Sousa

 

 

I placed my feet

inside a pair of sneakers without laces

as I stood on the edge

of a curb where unfamiliar faces ran

red lights and rode bicycles

with flat tires.  I searched for courage to ask

the Asian man inside the convenient store

who gingerly kneeled on a flattened box and stacked milk,

"How long before someone expires?

 

I placed my sunshine

inside an empty shoe box where it sat

on the bottom of a dusty closet floor

underneath clothes I have outgrown,

next to a box full of possessions

I could have owned:  My crush's number

on the back of a folded gas receipt and photos

of children I have yet to develop.

 

I placed my dreams

inside of a toilet that wouldn't stop running

next to a sink that dripped in sequence

with my sticky blinks.  Paint

on interior walls faded inside of a body that rejected

addiction, but was engaged

to lustful cravings.

 

I placed my air

inside an empty wallet next to invalid

library cards and bus passes from cities I knew

I would never visit again.  I folded it shut

until I wash ready to spend my time figuring out secrets

deeper than those kept by a teenage daughter

who memorized the lyrics to her father's unzipping.

 

An open window wind examined my 2-week-old beard

looking for the remnants of oil that came

off the fingertips of someone who understood.